Monday, November 14, 2005

Return Me to the Good Old Days

Remember when Target used to take returns?

Seriously. I remember only a few years ago when you could take anything back, no matter how old it was. And, if you didn't have a receipt they might not give you cash back, but they at least gave you store credit.

So what happened there? The other day I tried to take back a CD player that had crapped out after only about two months. And - I even had the "magical" receipt!


"I'm sorry, all electronics must be returned unopened within 45 seconds of purchase. And - you must provide notarized proof of purchase and 3 original birth certificates."


Sure, maybe their old return policy was a little lax, but these guys have gone to the other extreme now. I mean what's next?

"Excuse me sir, did you just remove that shirt from the rack?"

"Uh, yeah. I was looking at it but it's not the right size so I'm going to return it to the rack."

"I'm sorry sir, that won't be possible. Target is no longer taking returns. You're going to need to purchase that - and keep it for the rest of your life."

Like I said, I miss the old days when Target would take back anything. In fact, I watched a guy at the customer service desk have this conversation a few years ago:

"Uh, I'd like to return these underwear."

"No problem sir, was there a problem with them?"

"Uh, yeah, they started getting all these little holes here in the butt."

(How does that happen anyhow - when it looks like your underwear was shot in the butt with a shotgun?)

"See, right here. It's got these holes here in the back. Plus, there's all kinda stains here in the front."

"No problem sir. How would you like your refund? Cash, credit, money order, or a personal check from me?"

Ok, so maybe that particular example was a little extreme to the other side. But maybe Target should try to find some middle ground, that's all I'm saying.

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