Now that summer is in mid swing, I've been to quite a few outdoor festivals and concerts. As with every event, I always make sure I get there early enough to strategically place my chairs and blankets so as to be able to see the stage without obstruction.
And as the band is up there doing their thing, I really love just kickin' back and enjoying the show.
And then - it happens.
It happens EVERY time. The one thing that bugs the crap out of me more than anything, and forces me to ask this question...
Why the hell do people have to stand up when the band starts playing a "hit" song???
You know what I'm talking about. First three women way up front decide they have to stand up. "Oh look! We LOVE this song! I know - let's only think about ourselves and rudely stand up in front of all the people behind us because we're selfish and stupid and... and... and... oh yeah, we love this song!"
Then, because they're blocking the people behind them, those people have to stand up to be able to see. And before you know it, it's like friggen popcorn. Starting from the front of the crowd, one by one people start popping up so THEY can see as well.
Help me out here. I mean, what exactly is so terrible about staying in your comfortable chairs or chillin on your blankets where you can see just fine? What's so wrong with actually enjoying the experience without blocking the view of everyone else behind you?
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for giving the band a proper ovation when they first come out on stage. But after they start playing? Come on - why not sit down and enjoy the show?
I've been trying to contain this rant, but just the other day I was at an event that was the final straw. For the hour before the show, the entire crowd was sitting happily and respectfully waiting for the concert to begin. Then, 5 minutes before it started, 4 idiots walked right up in front of my chair and positioned themselves directly in front of me and completely blocked my view. They, in fact, were the only people standing in our entire section of the audience. I couldn't believe how inconsiderate these a-holes were being.
I, of course, couldn't stand it any longer and very politely asked them to please step aside because they were blocking my view. Not only did one of the women shoot me the dirtiest look I had ever seen - as if I was doing something wrong, but guess where they moved to?
Yep, directly in front of the people to my right.
It's times like these when I need my friend Dave to write a new edition of his signature books. This one would be called Attending Concerts for Dumbasses. Then when people stood up in front of me I could whip out a copy and hand it to them. Either that or I could smack them upside the head with one.
Either way it would be very satisfying.