A few things I found humorous this week:
Cut and Run - You hear this phrase a lot in the news lately, but the media has been using it improperly. My brother and friends have had a copyright on this concept for years.
I'll use my childhood buddy as an example. Say you're in a crowded store with him and in the middle of a traffic jam of people. One of his very favorite things to do is loudly "cut" and run, leaving you smelling like the bad guy. He never tires of this gag. Or making you gag.
Ed Helms - One of Jon Stewart's uber-talented "reporters," Ed put out one of the funniest bits I've seen on The Daily Show yet. Ed has a unique ability to sit across from someone and with a straight face ask them the most uncomfortably twisted questions he can dredge up. This story Box Lunch made me laugh out loud while I watched the show alone.
Don't let the bed bugs bite! - I took this picture here in St. Cloud the other day.
No really, they're fine. They had mattress pads on them. Yikes.
My Hood - Just when you thought St. Cloud was safe. This story from our local newspaper:
Police: Man drove mower while drunk
By David Unze email@example.com
Published: June 29. 2006 1:00AM
A 24-year-old man was charged Wednesday with driving while intoxicated after riding a lawn mower erratically through a west St. Cloud neighborhood.
"...cutting some grass as he went and up and down the 6200 block of Cape East Court"
I don't know, I'll take as much free lawn service as I can get.
My Sacrifices - Anyone who knows me or has been reading this blog for awhile knows that I eat a low-fat diet so I don't have to take pills for my cholesterol, which doesn't bother me at all. I've grown used to the many low or non-fat products available and now (finally) consider them to be as tasty as the originals.
Except for ONE. I don't normally pine over the foods I can't eat (with the exception of potato chips) but when I have to make my kids real bacon in the morning it pretty much kills me. So - in an effort to find a substitute, I decided to buy some low-fat turkey bacon the other day and give that a shot.
Here is what the package promises...
Not too bad... crispy ribbons of crunchy bacon-like goodness! Mmm.
Here is what you get. And this is after you cook it, if you can believe that...
It's like eating a belt.
My Last Post - Sorry folks, didn't mean to make you have to work for that one. But the funniest part of that post was the "deer in headlights" responses I received from it. The way I see it, one of two things happened:
1. Nobody understood it.
2. It wasn't funny.
Ok, since nobody understood it, I thought I would take this time to briefly explain what I was attempting to do.
First of all, the whole post is one big spoof about blog comments. I thought it would be fun to illustrate what might happen if a woman landed on the same blog as her partner and didn't know he was a regular reader.
To answer some of the questions I received in comments and email...
- No, those are not real comments. I made the whole thing up.
- No, I did not cut and paste actual comments into that post. I created this whole post from scratch and mocked it up to appear like a comments page.
- No, there is not a post called "Don't Mess With Grandma." I made that up as a backdrop for the fake comments.
- No, those are not real profiles. With the exception of mine, I made them up. However, please take time to note the puns I so carefully created in the characters themselves.
- No, I do not think I'm that funny (I didn't get asked this question but thought I would clarify anyway). All the comments on how funny Harmonica Man is, is a spoof on what I read on other (funnier) people's blogs.
Ok, so not your typical blog post, I'll admit that. But hey - why not shake it up a little bit?
So that's my week in review. All in all a pretty good week for me, but not as good as this weekend. I don't have to be back at my desk until Wednesday!!!
Have a great 4th of July holiday everyone, and try not to lose any fingers.