Thursday, November 08, 2007

Noises Support Group Minutes - MN Chapter

DATE: Week of November 4, 2007

LOCATION:
View From The Cloud - in the soundproof comments section of the Silence is Golden post.

CALL TO ORDER: Support group chairperson Jeff Lee

ROLL CALL: Jeff, Kathy, Heather, Peter, Leo, Mooselet, Avery, Jennine, Gale, Charli, Carla, Whit, Julie, Yello, Royce, VE, Linda, Rick, Andi, Signs&Wonders, Lois, Neva, Bill, Sandy, Caron, Elizabeth, Betty

COMMENTS: As chairperson of the MN chapter of our new support group for noises that irritate us, I would like to thank you all for joining us this week. I feel we had a very productive first meeting and am looking forward to "hearing" from all of you again in the future.

NEW BUSINESS:
1) New group name - Several ideas were suggested regarding the name of our new support group. Some of these were:
- P.A.I.N. (People Annoyed with Incessant Noise)
- Sounds without Bounds
- S.L.A.P. (Sounds Leading to Aggravated People)
- Noise without Joys
- H.U.S.H. (Having Unusually Sensitive Hearing)

Thank you for these submissions. These and others will be taken up for advisement and a vote will be held at our next meeting. In the meantime, please feel free to submit additional ideas to the suggestion box at this time.

2) Noise issues identified - One of the main missions of our support group is to embrace a concept known as "healing through revealing." The idea behind this is that you reveal your noise irritations to the group and by doing so - you take the first step toward an annoyance-free lifestyle. Here are the noises we identified as irritants as a group:
.computer fan
.florescent light buzz
.whining kids
.upstairs shower
.analog clock "tick tock"
.ceiling fan
.loud neighbor at night
.sitcom laugh track
.audio feedback
.glove-box squeak
.halogen lamp buzz
.dripping water tap
.cell phone interference with computer
.barking dogs at night or any small dog in general
.Kookaburras
.drink slurping
.banging bedroom door
.blaring TV
.squeaking brakes
.dishwasher
.husband's alarm clock
.chewing or crunching
.refrigerator door seal when opened
.the parrot from hell
."Mommmm!"
.Karen's voice (from Will and Grace)
.someone eating a banana
.TV hum
.peacock screams
.guy on the radio yelling prices on car/truck ads
.car "bong" sound when door is open
.bathroom fan
.ticking watch
.paper shredder
.quiz show soundtracks
.chair legs screeching across a wooden floor
.hotdish ingredients being stirred
.husband's snoring
.breathing dog's wheezing

As you can see, many "unique" audio issues were revealed. Please do not be discouraged that collectively, we are but one errant sound away from wearing coats with extra long sleeves. This has been a very substantial first step for our group and for you. However, we obviously have a lot of healing to do, so let's all make sure to come right back again so we can get started.

NEXT MEETING: Our next meeting date has not been determined at this time, but a memo will be sent in the near future. In the meantime, I would like to offer a few suggestions for you to consider in preparation of our next gathering.
1. Please remember to turn your off your cell phone. I think everyone agrees that VE's repeated ringtone interruption of "Like a Virgin" violated our most basic edict.

2. Also, please remember to clear your throat if your voice starts to make that "gurgally" sound when you're speaking. But most importantly -
DO NOT KEEP TALKING(!) unless you suddenly want 25 people involuntarily clearing their own throats in a futile attempt to get you to fix yours. I know it wasn't brought up as an irritant at our meeting but I feel I need to add it now.

3. Finally, for Jennine and Charli's sake, I would like to ask that you don't bring gum or snacks. Bill, unfortunately, seemed unable to speak without first tossing a handful of peanuts into his mouth - and none of us really needed to witness that.

MOTION TO ADJOURN: 9:00 p.m. (gavel was NOT slammed by request)

33 comments:

Whit said...

I second the motion.

Hey, do we have to pay dues? That's another sound I don't like- the opening of my wallet.

Jennine said...

roflmao

this so totally made my day!

Julie Pippert said...

LMAO...totally!

I didn't see "tantrumming children" on the list---can you add that next to "whining children?"

And those horrible dreadful blowers everyone uses now instead of brooms and rakes. I want a law against those.

Signed, Old Fart wrt Music and hearing Things

Julie
Using My Words

Julie Pippert said...

P.S. I vote for H.U.S.H

Julie
Using My Words

Kathy Frederick said...

I'm dying here. Just dying. Especially the noise hot food makes when you stir it. I now have several new things to annoy me.

*Julie -- the leaf blower thing is on my list. Don't worry. Someone else hates it, too.

I vote for H.U.S.H.

VE said...

How about P.O.R.N?

Perfectly Obnoxious Rude Noises

Mooselet said...

I, too, cast my vote for H.U.S.H because "stop that godawful noise right now" doesn't make as cool an acronym.

We need a badge for our blogs to spread the quiet word.

Caron said...

An "annoyance free lifestyle!" My dreams will become reality!

Jeff said...

whit - Good point. That has to be one of the most painful sounds of all.

jennine - Wow, you hauled out the roflmao for me? I'm truly honored. And now I'm hungry for oysters too.

julie - Leafblowers are a menace to society. My neighbor has a power washer that's powered by an air compressor. I think he used it every day this summer. I nearly moved.

kathy - Until this post I had never ever considered the sound of hot food being stirred. Now I won't be able to not notice it.

VE - Hmmm, interesting choice for you considering your ringtone and all.

mooselet - Great idea. But I'm a terrible badge creator so if anyone wants to have a shot at it I'll spread the word. Quietly of course.

caron - Just keep attending the meetings and salvation shall be yours!

regan said...

Hey! You forgot my name! I think a good motto could be 'We can hear you listening in' Or something along those lines.

Bill said...

Tell bloggers to wear a flack vest and a helmet, if I eat peanuts at the meeting.

Elizabeth said...

I love it!!
Oh, I also vote for H.U.S.H.
Also, I'm a Deaf Ed. teacher, I could teach us all sign language! It's very quiet.

Jeff said...

regan - No I didn't forget you, these minutes are only reporting the MN chapter attendees. You were at the Kathy's PA meeting this week. But you're welcome at either place! BTW, I believe Kathy is going to be publishing her minutes soon too so make sure to watch for those.

bill - And safety glasses. Don't forget safety glasses.

elizabeth - You're on! And for team building we could play charades - although we would have to ban the "grunting" that usually takes place when the people don't get your clue.

Carla said...

I snorted on that one. Laughed out loud, hope I didn't irritate anyone. Can I be Sargeant at Arms, with a long stick? So I poke people who's noises annoy me?
How about N.A.G.S.
Noise Avoidance Group Session

But Choas is good too, wait no one nominated that one..doh'

Heather said...

I have to apologize for my continual coughing at the meeting. I have antibiotics now so hopefully it will be gone by the next meeting. I appreciate not being thrown out. I know how annoying that coughing can be. Heck, I annoyed myself.

Jess Riley said...

This was HILARIOUS. "Someone eating a banana." I am still laughing.

I am not even going to tell you the name my friends gave to the noise made when stirring hot foods. Particularly casserole-type dishes.

Jennine said...

I cannot believe no one thought to include the "Head On, apply directly to the forehead" commercial.

JD said...

I'm from the Pennsylvania chapter and hereby register my vote for H.U.S.H. I'd also like to take issue with point 2 under "Next Meeting": throat clearing should be avoided under any circumstances. People attending meetings should clear their throats before entering.

This was a hilarious post! Now shut up, everyone!

deborah said...

How did I NOT get in on this meeting???

Too funny. You outdid yourself on this one. Hey, I'll bring the earplugs, HOWEVER, the dumb wrapper they come in is extremely loud when you POP it. Can you believe it??

Oh, and I used to interpret for the deaf, too!

loud bass in a car! a block away!!

macaroni being stirred is gros.

how about people who blow their nose in restaurants? while you eat!

The dog licking himself!!! Get me to a meeting, I need help

VE said...

Ok, I'll admit it...I skipped right past that hillarious reference about my ringtones the first time around on this. That's what happens when you read blogs on work time! I think "Like a Virgin" would be a fun ringtone down at the teen pregrancy office...or not. Thanks for including me in an actual post. Wow! I won't even have to stalk you in MN now.

rob said...

I think that we are all living in SIN. Stupid incessant noise.

A couple of my neighbours play with a model car all summer. It is powered by one of those little, but noisy out of all proportion to its size, motors. It sounds like a wasp on steroids.

QZ~Ba Doozie said...

someone said dog licking itself and that soooo totally should be in the top 10. AND people who scrape or clank their teeth on the eating utensil. How about people who breath loudly while eating? or the ones who make clicking noises with their false teeth? How about tapping nails on a countertop...how about sighing? I hate sighing. I also hate repetitive noises that kids make. I have stabbed people for less than this. Please let me in the group I want to be a part, I think I can bring a lot to the table..but I promise I won't smack or crinkle my chip/candy wrapper/bags in the movie theatre!!!!

The Egel Nest said...

Jeff -

Absolutely hysterical...Love it...lol

Do you need a factotum?

Bradley
The Egel Nest

Gary said...

I'll tell you what annoys me ...

Cell phones ringing on tv and the fact that they all use my ringtone - the countless hours I've spent looking for my phone and then shaking it in frustration because it won't tell me who just hung up - only to find it was some idiot in a tv drama.

In the olden days of crap tv speakers you'd never fall for things like that.

deborah said...

lmao!!!! Like a Virgin at the teen crisis center!!!!

Moi said...

The sound the TV makes when it is interrupted for a test of the emergency broadcast system?

Thought technically, I guess it is the sound of said system.

Either way, no one needs to hear that sound during a test. Save it for the actual emergency.

Found you from the Egel Nest. Very funny. Thanks for the laugh.

Jeff said...

jd, rob and moi - Welcome to our family. As you can see, you are not alone. And we're here for you - to listen and to help.

Mom Thumb said...

I like S.L.A.P., because it reminds me of Dane Cook - "It's the noise that makes me want to punch infants!"

rick said...

...yesterday I closed my dresser drawer on a wool sock. It made my teeth hurt.

Windyridge said...

Wow this is too much. I am annoyed by a lot of noises too. Never would have thought there would be a group like this. LOL

Jeff said...

mom thumb - Dane cook rocks. Even if he does like punching infants.

rick - Ok, that's weird. Must fall under the chewing on a dry washcloth category huh?

windyridge - Oh yeah, and we're growing bigger every day! AND - we're now planning monthly meetings as well so watch for our December get together. We were going to have a pot luck but that got canceled once hotdish showed up on the list.

Fourier Analyst said...

Been busy and obviously missed the meeting. You forgot "Fran" from "The Nanny" Not only her laugh, but almost everything she says!

And also any children who are in need of a nap.

I vote for SLAP!!

B. M. Lee said...

The "Secret Sound" game on the radio. That seems to bother me a lot.