Friday, August 08, 2008

Flare up

I borrowed a piece of Wrigley's Flare gum from a coworker today.

Ok, not technically "borrowed" as in I'll give it back when I'm done but borrowed as in hey... borrow me a piece of gum eh?

If you go to their website you can watch some YouTubes about this and their two other "5" gum products where they claim that Flare is "the cinnamon that warms as you chew."

Well, they couldn't be more right. Not only does it feel like it gets hotter the longer you chew it, but it actually gets so unnaturally spicy (for a gum) that it eventually turns into that novelty pepper gum you used to be able to buy in the back of Boy's Life Magazine. In fact, you can still buy something similar today right here!

Not to dis Wrigley of course because I'm sure there are gobs of people who like stuff like this. But me?... eh, not so much.

Anyway, after I had chewed it for about 10 minutes I walked up to my coworker's desk and quietly put it back in her drawer.

Heh... it turns out I actually did borrow this gum after all.

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The laughs are hot at this humor blog!


Chat Blanc said...

haha! note to self: never "borrow" something to someone (jeff).

Anonymous said...

I found the same thing to be true of your pickles.

Ed said...

Weird. Glad to see your returning things... Speaking of Gum, here was a little play on "The Game"...

You just lost the Gum! Looooser!

Everyone in the world is chewing the gum.
Whenever you think about the gum you lose the gum.
When you do lose the gum you must announce you lost the gum (and stop chewing!)
There is a grace period after you lose where for 20 minutes you can itch your balls or pick your nose, write a novel or whatever without worry about chewing the gum.

Some perpetual losers try to swallow the gum but then everyone knows that they like to swallow!

You just lost the gum.

Anonymous said...

Those new 5 gums are overrated. I tried the mint: the flavour lasted till I spat it out an hour later but it did not tingle my senses !

Anonymous said...

is it me or does that look like a condom packet?

Idaho Dad said...

Is this a gum for old people who are losing their taste buds?

I haven't paid attention to the gum industry since they were putting spider eggs into Bubble Yum back in '75.

Elizabeth said...

Sounds like something my 5th graders will dare each other to chew, like "Hey Billy, I bet you can't chew 5 pieces of this gum all at once."

Anonymous said...

I have that tendency to say I'll borrow something even when it's not something you can borrow either.

Hot gum doesn't sound too good at all!

Sarah said...

phil ruined gum for me

Anonymous said...

That's funny Sarah. Dan just ruined it for me.

Jeff and Charli Lee said...

chat blanc - Why not? I'll give it back.

jennine - That's not fair. You know I won't leave a reply about my hot pickle.

ve - I have no idea what that was all about. But hey that's ok... no need to clarify!

jaffer - That's false advertising! You should write to them and demand your tingle!

dan - I'm afraid to ask what you've been wearing lately.

phil - Come on, you know that's not true. It was '76.

elizabeth - Yikes! THAT would not be good!

chelle - You mean like, "Can I borrow that Kleenex?"

sarah - Why? Spider eggs are hardly noticeable.

jennine - Why? Condoms are hardly noticeable.

Sandy said...

Sure, you don't like it now...but come February when it's 20 below???

I mean, hey, you could chew like 4-5 pieces and then stick it in your mittens. Voila! Instant hand warmer.

Heather said...

I don't think I've chewed gum since high school.

April said...

Gum chewing is one of my pet peeves. Whatever it takes to make you stop, I applaud.

Lucy Stern said...

Never tried it but now I am ready to. I love cinnamon!

Durblady said...

My DD loves the cinnamon. I'm with you - not so much!

Alice said...

Of course I want to buy this gum now.

Are you getting kickback?

yoo hoo said...


Anonymous said...

It does look like a condom packet, for someone with flaming VD.

I've never heard borrow used that way before - cute!

Karen MEG said...

How considerate of you Jeff! Weird gum, though..

Hope your summer's going well!

JD at I Do Things said...

I don't know why they have to ruin everything by making it hot. I like hot sauce, hot tamales, Hot Pockets, hot dogs, but when it comes to gum or chocolate, please! Leave it as nature intended. I tried some chocolate with habanero spice and it was awful. The first few bites were delicious chocolate, and then things just went horribly wrong. Yukko.

JD at I Do Things

robkroese said...

Another kid on the schoolbus once gave me one of those jawbreakers that starts to taste really nasty after a few minutes. I remember running out of the bus and spitting it into the snow. I was like, "Why would anyone want to eat that?!" It didn't occur to me until weeks later that it was a joke.

Maureen said...

Yikes. Did you have any tastebuds left after that chew?

I'll stick to spearmint.

And yes, Phil. You ruined bubblegum for me now.

(Ha! Diesel!)

cathouse teri said...

Well I hate gum of any kind. So no danger in my trying this one. :)

Roger Miller said...

Thanks for the heads up on the super-hot gum... I just know that I would start sneezing my head off (no, I don't know why, maybe it's a defense mechanism), but only when I am driving 50MPH on a curve.

Maybe I shouldn't drive and chew gum at the same time, eh?

Corrina said...

Oooohhh I hate cinnamon flavored gum. Especially if it keeps getting warmer as you chew it. lol