Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Thank you... I'll be your entertainment for the evening.

So this last weekend my coworkers and I went out for our Christmas party to a fabulous bar and restaurant.

No, I take that back. The bar was fabulous. The restaurant? Not so much.

Why? Because my reuben sandwich was SOGGY. Total mush! Bleh! I expected much more from a place of this caliber.

Ok, I suppose I should mention, in all fairness to the restaurant, that my sandwich didn't start out that way. When I first received it, it was grilled to perfection - crispy on the outside and hot-n-gooey on the inside. Yum! Reuben heaven! But then something really odd happened...

As I was busy chatting it up with my friends, I grabbed the ketchup bottle off to my right, tipped it over my plate AND POURED BEER ALL OVER MY SANDWICH! Heh... turns out I wasn't paying close enough attention, and using my stellar periferal vision, I accidentally grabbed my beer bottle instead of the ketchup. Oops.


Still - I blame the restaurant. Someone should have caught my mistake, did a slow motion dive through the air and intercepted my tipped bottle before it ruined my sandwich. It seems you just can't find good wait staff any more.

The good news was, it really gave my friends the giggles. And not just for a few minutes... but for hours. And hours. And hours. And now apparently days as well.

And now I'm going to mark my calendar for early 2019...

... because 10 years is the average length of time it takes to live something down with these clowns.

30 comments:

Elizabeth said...

OMG that's hilarious! So how did your reuben and beer sandwich taste? Or did you order a new one?

Mulled Vine said...

Does this work with any sort of beer? I'm thinking of trying this at home. ;-)

Maureen said...

Yeah, I would think beer-soaked sandwiches would be heaven for a guy... It's like a time saver; eat AND get drunk at the same time!

Just think; you could patent the idea and make millions.

Okay, maybe not millions, but sogginess aside, you'd make a lot of friends with your culinary skillz!

Jen - Queen of Poo said...

Oh that's classic! You'll see that in a sitcom this next year, I guarantee it! We bloggers should be paid for the material we give lazy writers.

Gette said...

Actually, the ber-and-reuben sounds really good to me, except for the soggy...

Heather said...

Sob! Sounds like you wasted a perfectly good beer.

Jeff said...

Elizabeth - It ruined the experience for me. I was about 2 bites into it when I did that. And no, I didn't get a new one :-(

Mulled Vine - The darker beers are best, you know, to go with the dark pumpernickel bread.

Maureen - And for a side dish you could have vodka-soaked watermelon and rum balls for desert. You'd be smashed by the time dinner was over!

Jen - You mean my stuff isn't safe from theft? I put that little copyright thing at the bottom so there's no way someone could steal it. ;-)

Gette - Beer and reubens ARE good together in the same meal. Just not ON the same meal.

heather - The worst part was I had to cry in my reuben after it happened.

unfinishedrambler said...

That sounds like something I'd do. But hey, at least, it said Heinz. That's the only ketchup for me (and no, I don't work for the company, but I am obsessed with it, none of that Restaurant Recipe crap for me).

Roger said...

Was it foriegn or domestic? These things matter, don't you know? I mean come on, man! Share the whole story. :)

You have given me an idea though for the next time I have a Rueben sandwich. I love me a good Rueben, with beer even.

yellojkt said...

I think the bar should charge you extra for mopping up your spill with your food.

Sandy said...

Do you normally put ketchup on your Reuben??? Beer I can understand...but Heinz? Not so much.

And the real question is this: how much beer was even left in that bottle before you made that little gaff? I'm thinking not so much.

Have a good new year, you party animal!

Jeff said...

unfinished rambler - Heinz for me too. And it has to be ketchup, not catsup, whatever the hell that is.

Roger - Mich Golden Light is my current beer of choice. Sorry, not much of a story there. ;-)

yellojkt - On the contrary, I should have gotten a discount for doing their janitorial work for them!

Sandy - I like to dip my reuben in ketchup as I eat it. And you're wrong about the beer... it was nearly full and quite a lot poured out! (hence the perpetual giggle-fest)

April said...

Someday I'll have to post my Del Taco story - it's that kind of story!
Own it, Jeff. You love making people laugh, right?

Michelle said...

Nice going! And here I thought it was going to be nasty college boys who'd put beer in the ketchup bottle to be snots. This was MUCH better. I think I'll still be giggling in my sleep tonight!

Idaho Dad said...

This was simply the inner blogger in you fulfilling a subconscious need to find material for one last funny post before the year is out.

Shieldmaiden96 said...

...aaand that is your penance for putting ketchup on a Reuben. *shudder*

Everyone knows ketchup is for three things; burgers, fries, and scrambled eggs.

Jeff said...

April - I do like making people laugh, but not at the expense of my favorite sandwich. I have my limits!

Michelle - I suppose your husband won't mind that your dreaming about another guy in your sleep... when you explain that you're laughing at how much of a dork he is.

Idaho Dad - Busted! Hey, whatever it takes man.

Shieldmaiden96 - I don't put ketchup on my reuben... I dip my reuben in my ketchup. Not even close to the same thing. ;-)

Mom Thumb said...

I think you should have poured another beer on it, stirred it up, and created a new recipe - Reuben Beer Stoup. I think Rachel Ray would like it.

JD said...

the circle will be complete the next time you take a big swig of ketchup ....

Maureen said...

HAPPY NEW YEAR Jeff to you and yours!

bon bon said...

how many beers were had prior to said sandwich?

Ed (zoesdad) said...

Jeff, I would love to laugh but I just can't. I'm fairly upset at the image of a good reuben spoiled.

Kathy at The Junk Drawer said...

I don't know, Jeff. This is something I would do. Welcome to my world. How does it feel?

Prefers Her Fantasy Life said...

I think in Ireland they do that with their Guinness on purpose. ;)

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Classic!

I remember setting the cap temporarily back on top without turning it closed. Of course, before I got back to it, my girlfriend went to shake it, and ketchup flew all over the table behind us. I laughed and laughed ... THEY did not.

Beer sammies? - not so bad, are they??

ReformingGeek said...

I think I probably would have spilled the beer on my co-workers or drank it too fast and ended up dancing on the table. I'm not sure which would be worse.

JD at I Do Things said...

I'm having fun imagining the slow dive someone would've had to perform. It would have to involve a wide-open mouth so they could catch the beer (in slow-motion) just before it hit your sandwich.

This would make an awesome beer commercial. Or ketchup commercial!

JD at I Do Things

Jeff said...

mom thumb - That's so weird!... Did you know a reuben that has turkey instead of pastrami is called a "rachel?"

JD - I already do that. To save time I like to drink ketchup and then quickly eat my fries.

Maureen - Thanks. We DID have a happy time!

bon bon - That's what's truly so sad about this... it was still my 1st beer. :-(

Ed - It is a shame, isn't it?

Kathy - Yeah, but if this had happened to you, 97 people would have stopped by to laugh with you.

Meg - That's interesting, because there's already a pork chop in every bottle of Guinness, so adding a reuben to it would REALLY fill you up!

Speedcat - People are too uptight these days. Who doesn't think getting ketchup thrown all over them is funny? Sheesh.

Reforming Geek - Sounds like you also need to stay away from places with lampshades!

JD - See? You and I think alike. That totally should have happened.

Tony Single said...

Hmmm... I have fish in beer batter, and no one laughs at me. Mayhap I'm not trying hard enough... :p

HalfAsstic.com said...

Well, now that is just WRONG. Children can be so cruel...
(Now just go tell them somebody said that about them... heh heh.)