I know, I know, it's cold outside... blah blah blah. You've heard it from every blogger north of the Mason-Dixon Line these last few weeks.
But this has gone on long enough!
This weekend the average temperature was -15 degrees and let me tell you - it gets old really fast. Especially when 3 out of the 4 cars at our house wouldn't start and I had to put the battery charger on them for hours until they would.
The worst thing we had to deal with though was when one of our cars was "dead" in front of the garage, so we had to have my wife, my brother and both my boys help push it down the icy driveway and out into the road so Brandon could go to work. Sled dog harnesses would have come in handy right about then.
Anyway, all of this has me thinking about these things we do up here on a daily basis that wouldn't make sense to people on the lower half of the planet. So I've jotted down a few of them to share.
1. Plug in the car before going to bed (no, they're not electric cars).
2. Put your car in low gear at each stop light so the automatic traction control feature that's supposed to keep your tires from spinning doesn't engage and make your car feel like it has no power.
3. Go outside in your pajamas and slippers at 7:30 a.m. wearing a huge winter coat, hat and gloves to start your car before you take your shower so it's all warmed up and the windows are defrosted when you leave for work.
4. "Rake" your roof so an ice dam doesn't build up on the eave overhang of your house.
5. Shrink plastic over all the windows inside your house to increase their "R" factor.
6. Get in line at the car wash when it's above 10 degrees because it's the first time in weeks it's been warm enough to wash all the salt off your car.
7. Take a hair dryer outside and blast it into the door lock because water from the car wash you were in that morning has frozen inside the lock (alternate solution: heat your key up with a Bic lighter and then jam it in the lock).
8. Put Heet into your gas tank so the moisture in the gasoline doesn't freeze and plug up your gas line.
9. Slide right through a red light because the road has formed black ice and it's impossible to stop at the intersection.
10. Sprinkle rock salt and sand on the sidewalk so people don't slip and crack their heads open on your property and sue you.
1. I'd love to hear your additions or
2. some of the things southerners do that we don't have to do.