Friday, August 28, 2009

I Didn't Get The Job

Yes, the title is true.

Unfortunately I was passed over for the job I wanted, but all is well. There are other fish in the sea and I already have more applications submitted.

The good news is, I've learned from this experience. For example, not getting this job has caused me to reflect on what may have gone wrong - and I think I have captured some important key points.

So, here then are the...

Top 10 Likely Reasons I Didn't Get The Job:

1. Myers-Briggs test indicated I was best suited for goat herding

2. HR director probably didn't think the $100 I put in her thank-you note was enough

3. Got caught omitting the fact that I'm 1/8 Polish

4. $500,000 was too high for desired starting salary

5. Background check revealed my felony conviction for dog fighting

6. Putting "more than enough" under EDUCATION didn't impress them

7. Not wearing pants to the interview was not viewed as "self confident"

8. Probably shouldn't have written my resume on a bar napkin

9. Hiring manager felt her personal space was violated by my habit of talking within 4" of your face

10. I used VE as a reference

34 comments:

Susan said...

Have you considered a move to my area? In case you haven't heard, we'll cheer you if you have felony dog fighting convictions. Santa--him we throw snowballs at, but dog killers we apparently are OK with.

Ed said...

Ah, yes. The sins of omission are just as damning.

Idaho Dad said...

Hmmm, I probably would've viewed a lack of pants as showing a great deal of confidence.

Better luck next time. I recommend wearing pink spandex to your interviews.

The Doozie said...

you should have called her "little miz lady".



they love that sort of thing from what I understand. That or at your interview ask "do you press charges?"

*lynne* said...

Sorry you didn't get the job... But hey, you were seriously considered, that's a good sign. So keep at it, things'll work out.

Love your list!! :D

Elizabeth said...

I'm sorry about the job, I was really crossing my fingers that it would work out. I think #10 is what did you in.
:)

unfinished rambler said...

That No. 10 probably was the one that sunk you, although if you had put me as a reference, I doubt it would have turned out much better. ;)

But seriously, I'm sorry to hear about you not getting the job, but with your talents (whatever the heck they are :), I'm sure you'll get a job soon.

Mooselet said...

Sorry to hear you didn't get the job. But I'm glad to see you still have your sense of humour. Um, that was humour, right?

Michelle said...

I think with reasons like that, you're applying for entirely the wrong job. But I promise to take your list with me the next time I go on a job interview.

Travis R said...

Sorry to hear this one didn't work out. I have some great advice: I find that it's always good to call everybody "Toots" at interviews. Especially guys. It's a good ice breaker and a good gauge of the people there.

You gotta be a little bit careful about slapping them on the ass, though; I save that for the second interview, or maybe even the third if they seem a little bit uptight, particularly in places like convents or children's hospitals. Then again, if they're that uptight, it's probably not going to be a fun job anyway.

Just trying to help.

Drowsey Monkey said...

I once interviewed a woman who had her shirt on inside-out. She didn't get the job. To be honest that wasn't the only reason and I don't know why I'm telling you this.

One thing I do know is that probably wasn't the job for you - that's why you didn't get it. But that won't become apparent until you get the right job.

Good luck!

Jeff said...

susan - Those charges were bogus. They were only Chihuahuas and they were just arguing... not fighting.

ed - It wasn't my fault. There were no check boxes for "Pollock."

idaho dad - Exactly! They totally didn't see it.

doozie - I'm partial to "Missy." Women love that too.

*lynne* - I know they will. Thanks!

elizabeth - I think that was a factor. I was going to use you as a reference but you were off traipsing around China.

unfinished rambler - Talents? You're supposed to have talents for a job? WHY DOESN'T ANYONE TELL ME THESE THINGS!

mooselet - It's funny to me. That's not saying everyone else thinks I'm humorous though.

michelle - I'd love to see the job description that list would support. Wait... goat herding was recommended. And they don't care if you don't wear pants either.

travis - You know... I've totally overlooked the convent job market. But it'd probably be tough to get in. I hear they have an extremely low turnover rate.

drowsey monkey - She was probably just coming from her job at the "dance" club and was in a hurry. You know how dark those places are.

JD at I Do Things said...

I'm really sorry, Jeff. From everything I've heard about you, I would've thought going pantsless would've been a HUGE plus. But not everyone has the same tastes, I guess.

Although . . . maybe the problem was the close-talking AND the no-pants-wearing. You know, there might've been some inappropriate bodily contact there. Just sayin'.

thewordwire said...

Sorry to see that a job you were hopeful about didn't work out. As a fellow job hunter, I feel your pain. The bright side is that you have more time for fun blog posts. Good luck with your search. Thanks for the laugh.

SiteInsights said...

Tough break on the job.

I think $150 is the industry standard for HR Directors... Ya' know... inflation and all.

carlae said...

Maybe they already had a corporate blogger. Do you still have your other job?

Mom Thumb said...

Sorry you missed this one, but glad to hear there are other fish in the sea.

I had a hot flash during an interview, at least you don't have to worry about that. I hope.

Kathy said...

I know exactly what your problem was. You didn't put us all down as references. What's that? The thought hadn't occurred to you? Hmmm. Strange.

I agree with Drowsey. This wasn't the right job then and you won't know that until you have the one meant precisely for you.

Maureen said...

Aw crap, so sorry to hear that Jeff. But you are right; there are more than one opportunity out there.

And you should have known better than to use VE as a reference. I'm just sayin'...

Roger said...

Sorry you didn't get the job, I was really pulling for you to get it.

As for your reasons... I think that #10 might have sunk you. :)

Heather said...

Aw, I'm sorry Jeff.

Janna said...

11. You forgot to autograph the two dozen complimentary Receders CD's you gave her.

12. There was a vicious rumor that you went camping and set up your tent on a sand pad with a tin roof over your head.

13. You probably scared them away with the package of chicken feet.

Jeff said...

jd - Thank you. That's quite an endorsement. Especially with your experience as a nudist! And yeah, close talking and pantlessness don't mix. At least in the business world.

thewordwire - No, thank YOU for stopping by! It's always fun to meet a new blogger. :-)

siteinsights - D'oh! Seems I'm always a day late and a dollar short.

carlae - Yes, my current/old job is still in tact. It's just dissolving at a rapid rate.

mom thumb - I burst into flames during an interview once. Does that count?

kathy - I think that actually made sense. I think.

maureen - I'm starting to get that message. It just seemed to make so much to use him at the time.

roger - Again with the VE. Good thing he hasn't stopped by here or he might get a complex.

heather - Thanks Heather. That was just like a virtual hug. :-)

janna - All valid points. It seems I have a lot to learn.

Bill said...

The medical business might not be the job you would want, when the government tries to run it. I read it took 100 pages to qualify just to sell a clunker.

rick said...

You just pissed off 38,130,302 people in Poland. Bad Karma.

Jeff said...

bill - That's exactly the kind of job I want. If they can make it impossible to get anything done I'll have job security for life!

rick - Not likely... my site statistics show that I've only ever had one visitor from Poland - and he didn't get it.

Bill said...

My grandfather was one of those brave Polish. He did, however, suspect his wife was trying to kill him when he found a bottle of Polish Remover on top of his dresser.

Phyllis said...

I like sheep, and I am sure they have them in Poland! Sorry about the job, but that just means there is something better out there waiting for you.

Babs-beetle said...

I'm not sorry that you didn't get the job that wasn't meant for you. The one that's just around the corner is a much better one and far more suitable.

The word verification is 'wordi'

Job Openings said...

i am sorry to hear that, hope you get hired soon!

Jeff said...

bill - Ba-dum!

phyllis - Hey, herding sheep and goats is starting to sound better all the time.

babs - Ooh... I never looked around the corner. I'll check there tomorrow! :-)

job openings - Thanks for the nice wishes. Too bad your web site doesn't have any openings here in the US.

VE said...

Yeah, that no. 10...what a loser reference he is. I heard his gnomes tied up your potential boss and then strapped a whole bunch of inline skates all over him and then threw him down that big steep hill just to watch him fly down it.

Oh, wait, No. 10 is me!!! Dang it.

Sorry to hear about the job. I told them to ignore the mullet pictures I supplied to them but I guess they're just no fun!

Prefers Her Fantasy Life said...

I'm sorry to hear that. I should have warned you about VE.

Mike said...

Think of it this way- did you really want to work there if they have that strict of a dress code?

You got to let people express their individuality in the workplace, you know!