Comments on View from the Cloud: Mr. Know-It-All

Will me an my boyfriend stay together for a long t...

2008-06-03T06:47:00.000-05:00

Will me an my boyfriend stay together for a long time if yes how long an if no how did we split up

I have a question. How do I know if my Bush money...

2008-05-17T01:40:00.000-05:00

I have a question. How do I know if my Bush money is going to be put in my account via automatic deposit or if I'll be sent a check? Who makes this call?

Dear Mr. Know-It-All, Why do stars suddenly appea...

2008-05-15T13:14:00.000-05:00

Dear Mr. Know-It-All, Why do stars suddenly appear, every time you are near?

Signed
lil' g

Dear Mr. Knowitall,

How did that rabbit get...

2008-05-14T23:50:00.000-05:00

Dear Mr. Knowitall,

How did that rabbit get into your hat?

A-HA! I knew there was something shady going on wi...

2008-05-14T15:34:00.000-05:00

A-HA! I knew there was something shady going on with the Tupperware and Gladware people.

(And it must've been a while since you had a mammogram--you don't have to take off your pants for it; at least I never have.)

Ahem. My question is: How come it's so easy to get Vicodin but so hard to find cough syrup that actually suppresses a cough? And don't tell me to take Vicodin for a cough. I've tried that. MANY times.

PG and I are in legal discussions over illegally t...

2008-05-14T13:08:00.000-05:00

PG and I are in legal discussions over illegally tapping each others minds...we've also cofounded a watchgroup organization for Mr. Owl...

drowsey monkey - That's what it's all about!

2008-05-13T23:25:00.000-05:00
drowsey monkey - That's what it's all about!

ve - Oops... PG beat you to the Tootsie Pop question, but I'm sure Mr. KIA will be happy to address your coconut confusion.

phil - Good grief... 37,000 songs? You must have a huge freakin iPod!

Mr. Know-It-All,

Don't you know how long it...

2008-05-13T23:12:00.000-05:00

Mr. Know-It-All,

Don't you know how long it takes to go through 37,000 songs looking for one with just the right 15-seconds of audio splendor?

Of course you know. You're Mr. Know-It-All.

Back to browsing my music. Sigh.

That's good advice...(one of my favorite lines fro...

2008-05-13T23:11:00.000-05:00

That's good advice...(one of my favorite lines from League of their own when Tom Hanks comments that after giving a kid a baseball that says "Avoid the clap")

Ok, questions:

Mr. Knowitall
I don't trust Mr. Owl, how many licks ARE there in a tootsie pop?

What really happens when you put the lime in the coconut and call him in the morning?

I feel so shmart now, especially since the hokey p...

2008-05-13T22:53:00.000-05:00

I feel so shmart now, especially since the hokey pokey thing has been sorted. whew.

kathy - Wait a minute... you buy Gladware? I had n...

2008-05-13T21:08:00.000-05:00

kathy - Wait a minute... you buy Gladware? I had no idea you were so liberal. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

anonymous - Oh absolutely my readers take my advice seriously. Who else is going to teach them about Tupper-ninjas?

Mr. Know-It-All, I'm afraid you're answer to the d...

2008-05-13T19:09:00.000-05:00

Mr. Know-It-All, I'm afraid you're answer to the dog sniffing before it pees couldn't actually be further from the truth. This is my first time visiting your blog, however, and I don't know if people take what you say at face value or not. But just in case, I figured I could answer it correctly anyway. Dogs ARE smelling for spots that have already been peed on. Then, they pee on that spot, which serves two purposes, marking territory and establishing dominance.

Jeff, is there a similar ninja training for the pe...

2008-05-13T18:28:00.000-05:00

Jeff, is there a similar ninja training for the people who are making all of the lids to my Gladware no longer fit the containers they came with? The lids all become smaller and I have to buy new ones. What is the cause of this?

Also, why does my cat Lucky pick up his food by the claw and dump it in his water dish?

groovy mom - Leaping lizards, you guys ask some to...

2008-05-13T16:53:00.000-05:00

groovy mom - Leaping lizards, you guys ask some tough questions!

sornie - Hmmm, what do you do at your job again?

I like the tipping question. I directly provide a ...

2008-05-13T14:41:00.000-05:00

I like the tipping question. I directly provide a service but the only tip I receive is constant grief from customers wen they don't like something. WHen it's good my only way of knowing is that nobody is saying anything. Why is that?

Wow, Mr. Know-it-all, there is no stumping you is ...

2008-05-13T14:40:00.000-05:00

Wow, Mr. Know-it-all, there is no stumping you is there?

Here's my question:

Isn't there a better solution to the 365.25 days in a year dilemma than having a leap year? It's just not fair to those who happen to be born on Feb. 29th.

michelle - These are both good questions. Thanks!<...

2008-05-13T12:03:00.000-05:00

michelle - These are both good questions. Thanks!

pg - You're right... that turtle seems like a shady character for sure.

mom thumb - Oh, you rebel. Rockin out to Layla? That's rad man.

mrs. r - Ok, rockin out to Layla might be rad, but rockin out to Celine is sad.

Years ago on a sunny day in Southern California, m...

2008-05-13T11:31:00.000-05:00

Years ago on a sunny day in Southern California, my friends witnessed a 1970's buick cluncker driving down the road, windows rolled down, with three hard core looking guys in it, blasting Celine Dion at maximum decibels. In French.

Thanks for the tipping advice - I did get to keep ...

2008-05-13T10:28:00.000-05:00

Thanks for the tipping advice - I did get to keep my pants on.

The kids thought it was pretty funny years ago when "Layla" came on the radio and I cranked it. Gray mini-van shaking the roadway.

I am in awe of Heather NOT shooting someone, given her advanced state of pregnancy. You go girl.

MKIA,

I don't trust that turtle as far as I...

2008-05-13T09:31:00.000-05:00

MKIA,

I don't trust that turtle as far as I can throw him... I need the real scoop. How may licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?

thanks,
PG

Mister Know It All,
Why are the turn signal lig...

2008-05-12T23:03:00.000-05:00

Mister Know It All,
Why are the turn signal lights broken on so many cars?

And why is it that my children only seem to wake up in the middle of the night on the nights that I'm the most exhausted?

I checked with Mr. KIA and he said you should defi...

2008-05-12T22:33:00.000-05:00

I checked with Mr. KIA and he said you should definitely go with the theme opening. Then he told me not to offer any suggestions because your music library outnumbers mine by about 100 times. He's a pretty sharp guy that Mr. Know-It-All.

Dear Mr. Know-It-All,

I have an emergency q...

2008-05-12T22:23:00.000-05:00

Dear Mr. Know-It-All,

I have an emergency question. I'm putting together my very first podcast, but am having trouble selecting a cool 10 to 20-second opening music theme. My first idea (Casino Royale by Herb Alpert) was was blatantly stolen by a fellow blogger (nevermind that he had the idea first).

Should I have an opening theme, or should I go directly to my monotonal sleep-inducing voice?

marie - Was that a rhetorical question or one for ...

2008-05-12T20:24:00.000-05:00

marie - Was that a rhetorical question or one for Mr. KIA? I personally think Harry's the greatest thing since sliced French Quarter bread.

alice - Ooh, good question! I can't wait to see what Mr. KIA has to say about that one!

heather - So you're saying you shot the sheriff?

maureen - My knowitallness knowsnobounds.

elizabeth - Hmmm, I already know what he's going to say about that. We know each other very well.

Dear Mr. Know-It-All,
Are my husband and I the ...

2008-05-12T20:11:00.000-05:00

Dear Mr. Know-It-All,
Are my husband and I the only people left who don't own cell phones? Is this a good or bad thing?
-Elizabeth